James King mentioned to me at the 1992 reunion that he was thinking of assembling a collection of written pieces from ex-Caldecott children on what they had thought of life when at Caldecott and I agreed to write something. Possibly I might have written a bit differently in 2022.
Random Thoughts on the Caldecott Community
1. The Living Community
Life in a community is about appreciating the effects of others on you and also the effects of you on others. Looking back, I see my time at Caldecott as having been peopled with characters, many of them larger than life and improbable.
I remember the strange and exciting experience of finding myself living with a large number of other humans. It was if I had acquired dozens of new relatives – brothers, sisters, cousins, great-aunts and so on. There were numerous personalities to study – discovering good and bad points, strengths and weaknesses; characters to encourage, enjoy, tolerate, avoid, confront, laugh with or at, as the case may have required.
This was all very different in nature from living with my family, distanced from mother and father by age, parental attitudes, their own problems of life or whatever. It was also a world apart from the limited social activities with children at primary school and elsewhere, meeting them in defined types of situation and each of us going home afterwards. At Caldecott you could see your peers from the time you opened your eyes in the morning until you closed your eyes in the night. You washed and dressed with the other boys or girls, as applicable. You ate meals with other children and with adults. You saw them in a wide range of circumstances, experiencing every mood – clever, sensible, foolish, joking, tempestuous, sulky, charming and everything else.
I am no expert on children but I have learned not to underestimate them. They can be resourceful and at least as perceptive as adults. Their minds are quicker and more adaptable to situations. We certainly soon learned all that was really important to us about the other boys and girls as well as about the adults that were running the Community (at least notionally). It was a good place to find that you get more out of life if you put something into it, enjoying giving as well as receiving, being a friend as well as having friends. You learned how to understand people.
You also learned to make the most of what you had. I remember a friend who told wonderful stories at the time we were both at Caldecott. We all knew that the boy was an out and out liar, but we suspended our disbelief because we enjoyed the tales so much. A friend at twelve can be a friend for life.
GTM